Marriage consists of a man and a woman, that is, the husband and wife. But when a third party comes into the marriage either invited or not, there is bound to be a lot of problems which opens the home to intrusion from family and friends. Perhaps one of the challenges in this stead best describes the present
predicament of a successful businesswoman Mrs. Rosi Jei ( not real name) who deals in accessories and travels wide, on a weekly basis.Mrs. Jei is still at a loss over what may have befallen her marriage. She is particularly perturbed because at the centre of the controversy is her younger sister. Her younger sister (Jane) is currently pregnant for Mrs. Jei’s husband. Popularly called Mama Gold, Mrs. Jei blames herself for her ongoing predicament. Relating her ordeal to Nigerian Pilot Sunday, Mama Gold blamed herself for giving room to the devil that came through her own sister to destroy her home. “I am a mother of four, two girls and two boys.
It all started in the year 2012 when my husband went out of job and couldn’t get another. So we agreed on me doing business. I sell accessories like gold and was doing well until late 2013, when my husband was reinstated in his former job but I didn’t stop my business because my business was successful. I travel more to different places like Cotonou, Ghana etc but I have never spent more than two to three days because of my family. “Earlier in 2014, my husband added more money to support the business and I grew more in Benin and Delta and other places and decided to allow my younger sister who was seeking for admission but was yet to be given her choice of study, to come stay with us till she gets it.
I ensured all things were in place before leaving for my business. Suddenly, I started noticing changes in my sisters body which persisted and told my mother who called her, so I thought it was resolved but to my surprise this year, 2015, my parents called to inform me that the pregnancy belongs to my husband. Shockingly, he accepted responsibility, saying that he does not regret what he did. “Right now, my sister is in our house and my husband has concluded that if I would not allow my sister to stay with us, I should leave the house instead.
I take the blame but I would like her to go to my parents as family members had decided. I am so confused right now but after the birth of the child, I will claim and cater for the baby after she gives birth. But if she refuses to give birth in my parents’ house, I will have to face it though, it won’t be so easy to stay and share my husband with my younger sister, but it will give me room to change and hope for the better while I leave God to be the judge over us all. If actually it was the wrong thing to have allowed my own sister into my home until she gains admission God will judge.
When Nigerian Pilot Sunday sought the opinion of Nigerians on the best way to proffer solution to the issue, Mrs. Blessing, a businesswoman, said she would not permit her sister to remain in her home. “Seriously speaking, the man’s wife might not have acted well but at the same time, she didn’t do anything wrong allowing her blood sister to care for her children while she was away because many people do it on a daily basis. “She should not live in the same house with her sister and husband, but the man can rent another apartment for the sister till she delivers even if he wants to visit her everyday just for peace to reign between the sisters. Dibie Charles an apprentice, encourages Mrs. Jei to leave the house for them. “Let the legally married wife leave the house for her sister since she gave room to it. But the man didn’t do well for not calling the wife to order when she was abandoning her marital duties in the name of business. He should not have paid her back in such a way by getting involved with her sister.
Also commenting, a Wema Bank staff, Mr. Inojie Nicolas, revealed that the couples were not meant for each other. “Come to think of it, he encouraged his wife to do business to assist the family and decided as a man of the house for the sister-inlaw to be with them and at the same time, descended to the level of hurting the wife whom I am sure he never cautioned but improved her business by involving his finances. The answer is so simple, they are definitely not meant to be. A cement distributor in Agege area of Lagos State, Mr. Peter Sunday, suggested that the man keeps both woman despite been sisters. “It wouldn’t be a crime if the man stays with both women even though they are sisters because attempting abortion is sinning against God so, to make things right, let him manage both until the younger one delivers then, further decision can be taken thereafter. An undergraduate, Azuka Okolo said, “Women are aggressive and could be worst when it has to do with someone or something they have sacrificed a lot to possess.
I suggest that the man sends the sister-in-law away until she delivers and stick to the lawfully wedded wife who has had children for him while they both accept her sister’s baby when it is born. “Furthermore, Pastor David, of one of the Pentecostal Churches, suggests that the man undergoes a serious deliverance, “That man is sick and should be taken in for deliverance for ever saying that the wife would leave the home if she refuses her younger sister to share same roof with them. Any man ought to see the sister-in-law as a sister too and not some kind of companion, whether the wife is on a business trip or not. There is absolutely no excuse for such behaviour. Pastor David concluded angrily that the sister-in-law should go to her parents till she delivers and leave what has been joined together because no one ever asked for her help.
He also suggested that she faces her own life thereafter, but the wife should have faced the affairs of her home instead of chasing worldly possessions in the name of caring for need of the home when it is the man’s responsibility. For this, I say both have failed and should tackle it because it is obvious that the man did it intentionally. But according to one Mr. Larry, he said, “The man has done it so, he should keep both women. The heart of a man needs happiness to live longer and since he has found joy in the sister-in-law. I advice Mrs. Jei to quit for the younger sister to continue with the husband and marriage proper while she face the business. “Yes I said that for it to serve as a big lesson to every woman.
He is not wrong for finding a wife and mother for his children in his sister-inlaw since the wife was never around. But if both sisters stay with the man, I pray he won’t get tired of constant quarrels and shouting except he gives both different apartments. No matter people’s stand, counsel and rebuke or condemnation on the issue or the persons involved, Mrs. Jei is still devastated because her opinion isn’t relevant as her husband has remained adamant over his decision to live with her younger sister
